Tour de France 2022: consider your Aussie work mates, hey

Ever tried watching people ride bikes for three weeks with nothing but a laptop for company? Spare a thought for the 2022 couch peloton.

I’ve found myself in a strange position for the 2022 Tour De France. For the first time since moving to Australia from the UK in 2010, I’m in a workplace where, as far as I know, I’m the only one who is glued to SBS Cycling Central for three weeks straight, into the small hours, watching Le Tour. In pro cycling terms, it’s like being at the start of a very long climb and realising I have no teammates, no snacks, no team car – hell, I might as well not even have a bike.

In years gone by, I’ve always had colleagues who cycle and/ or obsess over the Tour, meaning there’s been a tacit understanding that we’ve all been up till three in the morning and need to go a little easy on each other: no loud noises, no sudden movements (other than passing each other a water bottle and energy gel if we see our teammates looking dehydrated).

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Paul Dalgarno is author of the novels A Country of Eternal Light (2023) and Poly (2020); the memoir And You May Find Yourself (2015); and the creative non-fiction book Prudish Nation (2023). He was formerly Deputy Editor of The Conversation and joined ScreenHub as Managing Editor in 2022. X: @pauldalgarno. Insta: @dalgarnowrites